June 2013
home alone? did you mean time to practice for my broadway debut?
i found out about that burn blog posting everyone’s ‘nudes’
and i was gunna submit a horse as me because of my url
so i googled naked horse
horses are always naked
im so stupid i hate myself
becoming an adult is weird
it’s like
wow i can drive a car and set my own schedule
wow i can go online and buy 50 dragon dildos
wait what?
did i stutter
i was at the wal mart today and a lady said mean thing about gays and a little boy defend the gays!!! what a brave haha please give me notes
“i want to wear shorts because it’s hot but i really hate my legs” an autobiography
“I want to wear shorts but i didnt shave” the sequel.
“I want to wear shorts but I don’t tan and I’d rather not blind you” The trilogy
“I want to wear shorts but my huge dick always sticks out” a pop-up book
a pop up book
mary had a little lamb
little lamb
little lamb
mary had a little lamb
whose fleece was swag as fuck
if u smash snails on purpose ur a fuckin piece of shit they are tiny cuties trying 2 get somewhere as fast as they can pls help them out
um excuse me have you ever had a garden because those fuckers will fuck your shit up i mean they totally ruined an entire row of my broccoli plants in one night i am not even fucking around about my broccoli fuck snails
OKAY SO ALMOST 2 MONTHS AGO OUR ENGLISH TEACHER FORCED US TO ENTER A POETRY CONTEST AND I WAS ABOUT TO ENTER A POEM WHEN IT TRIED TO FORCE ME TO GIVE IT A TITLE SO IN A FIT OF RAGE I WROTE A NEW POEM COMPLAINING ABOUT THE TITLE REQUIREMENT
AND TODAY I WENT TO CHECK MY EMAIL AND I??????
YOU ARE LITERALLY PUBLISHING AN INSULT TO YOUR OWN RULES BUT OKAY I GUESS IF GETTING TALKED DOWN TO TURNS YOU ON SOMEHOW AND I GET PUBLISHED I’VE GOT NO COMPLAINTS HERE?
“When someone is crying, of course, the noble thing to do is to comfort them. But if someone is trying to hide their tears, it may also be noble to pretend you do not notice them.”
—Lemony Snicket (via psych-facts)
